destination unknown

ahhh....what a holiday can do to you. I am completely opposed to Thursday holidays, they are asinine, honestly, the last thing I want to do tomorrow is go to work, after a wonderful sunny day today! And not to mention the poor kids of Korea begin their new semesters tomorrow, changing schools, changing teachers, changing friends, changing uniforms and entering the ever more demanding Korean educational system, I could not have survived it.

I think that all this chaos around me sent my head into a tail spin through the past few days, I have found this sudden sense of urgency to sort my life out, to sign my contract for next year and know where I am headed, to know what my future will be.

Korea- So I thought, coming back to Korea would be an opportunity to save more money and return to a place where I am comfortable, "where everybody knows your name" kind of lifestyle. I could leave many of my belongings here when I go home, making the traveling and relocating that much easier. Would I stay in Suncheon or relocate to a different city? I have seen more of this country than I have of the United States, and most of it looks the same. However, coming back my lifestyle would also be better, I would be in a public school with more vacation and a higher pay. This was what I thought I wanted.

Now I see things a bit more clearly, or more so in a different light. Would I return here and expect the same life? What is the purpose of coming back to a place that isn't home when the main purpose of me doing this is to continue growing, to continue learning about other cultures and to gain as much perspective on my life and my being as possible? Would I being doing it for any other reason then the ease which I could come back to it in? Would I be doing it to come back and continue relationships? Those aren't the reasons to return, a relationship can withstand time and distance when it is meant to be...sometimes you have to find it out the hard way and that isn't something I want to get in to. You aren't meant to run from great people but your aren't meant to form your future around them. I guess that isn't something I had really thought about coming here and now it sits heavy on my brain.

I could nip off to Japan, a great culture, a fun metropolitan atmosphere, where the air is clean and the streets are kimchee and dirt free. Where you can pee in the road and you cant throw your garbage out your window. I could leave my stuff here still, grab it on my way back through, and still be close enough to Korea if I am unable to let some of those relationships go.

Thailand would also be amazing, a mystery to me now as I don't know too much about it, only the stories I had heard and the exotic images I have painted in my head.

Hong Kong is another option, I have heard amazing things about Hong Kong, often times being referred to as a completely separate entity from China. However, I have also heard a lot of mixed things about working in China and have a feeling it is equally as "unclean" as Korea.

I guess the only way to figure all of this out will be a lot of research and a lot of soul searching. I have begun applying for jobs in all of these places and will just do what feels right when the time comes, I'll place it in the hands of fate to make the decision for me, that seems a lot less stressful.