I figured I would take tonight to write and gather myself, to try and plow through the writers block I have found myself in these past few weeks. For the first time in a month I have stopped, looked around and begun to reflect on what is happening around me. Of course, it didn't happen, the block wont dissipate just because i want it to and i have accomplished nothing that I wanted to tonight. I also think it is because it isn't really a block I am in, but rather a persistent voice in my head refusing to let me be honest with myself. You can only really write what you know and figuring that out is often the hardest part.
Coming in to this place in my life I swore off love, I swore off feeling anything for anyone and more so letting myself get attached to anyone in any way. I have now realized that this is both no way to live your life and in no way possible when you are a Cancer, a nurturer by nature, and that although there was a bad fish in your pond, that doesn't necessarily mean that they have all be soured.
Over the past few weeks my soul has kind of been cleansed, my mind has become more at ease and I have gained back some of ability to trust that I had lost. I have that giddy...cant wait until we meet again....middle school like butterfly feeling that I live for, that everyone lives for (i think so at least). What fun is life if you don't have someone to giggle with, to poke fun at and with whom to poke fun at the world with?
Although my life is in a sort of volley, back and forth between everything I thought I knew and the world ahead that I am trying to get a feel for, although I don't have a word that is proper in accordance with the standards society places around relationships to assign to this, right now, in this moment, I am genuinely happy, for the first time in a long time and that is enough for me. Simply happy.
2.26.2007
Regrouping- and a few forgotten moments
The past few weeks have been a sort of whirlwind, of meeting new people, of learning that it is OK to let someone in again, of realizing that I know myself more now then I ever have and of having a bit of faith in someone for the first time in a long time.
We planned on celebrating a friends birthday at Black, a funky dance club previously mentioned, however, due to the fifth change in ownership, it was closed. We then decided to try and go to Hobak, in English, Pumpkin Club. When we, 20 drunken Waygooks approached the door, we were told no. We thought it was because we were foreigners however, it was because we were under the age of 30. So we took the party across the road to Elvis, a fun dive bar with possibly
y the largest vinyl collection in Korea, where the mood is set through the music the owner plays. The "cool" thing to do here, when drunk, in a foreign land as a man is to take your shirt off and display your manliness. For some reason the Koreans seem to love it.
(thank you kirsten for this picture....us shake'n ass in Black)
It was also at some point over the past few weeks that we
executed Eyore! One night before heading out, Kirsten and I decided that it would be proper to put this stuffed animal out of its misery. As it turns out this thing had seen more foreigners houses then anyone would care to admit and I was the
end of the line. And so, a knife was taken to his throat and we proudly carried his head and tail to the bar in the style of Lord of the Flies and displayed our kill for all to see. A photo shoot was set up and we turned the George Cloony of Suncheon in to a Mule!
At some point I also took to the art of bar stool fighting. Late night these bar stools are often used as weapons, transportation devices and flying objects! (again...kirsten thanks for the picture...Matt and I engaging in war)
I realized the madness of Korea again as I walked home from work tonight I was trying to figure out what was going on around me. Children were walking around the streets at 9pm, all of them on vacation but busy running from Academy to Academy...A chicken delivery moped with a Chicken driving.
The past few weeks have been filled with random events. I called in sick to work on Friday to be told b
y my boss that she would be over with an IV of grape sugar...I said no thank you and headed over to the hospital. Forgetting that the last time I had been there was for a period issue and so with no questions as to why I was there they sent me up to the OBGYN floor. My boss showed up and informed me that they thought I wanted to speak with someone about having a baby and she marched me down to pediatrics where they gave me 15 satchel's of random pills and sent me on my way. Needless to say I feel a bit better!
We planned on celebrating a friends birthday at Black, a funky dance club previously mentioned, however, due to the fifth change in ownership, it was closed. We then decided to try and go to Hobak, in English, Pumpkin Club. When we, 20 drunken Waygooks approached the door, we were told no. We thought it was because we were foreigners however, it was because we were under the age of 30. So we took the party across the road to Elvis, a fun dive bar with possibly
y the largest vinyl collection in Korea, where the mood is set through the music the owner plays. The "cool" thing to do here, when drunk, in a foreign land as a man is to take your shirt off and display your manliness. For some reason the Koreans seem to love it.(thank you kirsten for this picture....us shake'n ass in Black)
It was also at some point over the past few weeks that we
executed Eyore! One night before heading out, Kirsten and I decided that it would be proper to put this stuffed animal out of its misery. As it turns out this thing had seen more foreigners houses then anyone would care to admit and I was the
end of the line. And so, a knife was taken to his throat and we proudly carried his head and tail to the bar in the style of Lord of the Flies and displayed our kill for all to see. A photo shoot was set up and we turned the George Cloony of Suncheon in to a Mule!At some point I also took to the art of bar stool fighting. Late night these bar stools are often used as weapons, transportation devices and flying objects! (again...kirsten thanks for the picture...Matt and I engaging in war)
I realized the madness of Korea again as I walked home from work tonight I was trying to figure out what was going on around me. Children were walking around the streets at 9pm, all of them on vacation but busy running from Academy to Academy...A chicken delivery moped with a Chicken driving.
The past few weeks have been filled with random events. I called in sick to work on Friday to be told b
y my boss that she would be over with an IV of grape sugar...I said no thank you and headed over to the hospital. Forgetting that the last time I had been there was for a period issue and so with no questions as to why I was there they sent me up to the OBGYN floor. My boss showed up and informed me that they thought I wanted to speak with someone about having a baby and she marched me down to pediatrics where they gave me 15 satchel's of random pills and sent me on my way. Needless to say I feel a bit better!
2.20.2007
Welcoming the Year of the Pig
Valentines Day certainly made up for last years mishaps. We spent the night in my favorite restaurant, a quaint Samgupsal restaurant where the people are just lovely.
Thursday I ventured over to the "Miracle Library" with my students for a production of Cinderella and Little Red Riding Hood. I was a bit concerned about the time, my class periods are only 50 minutes long so I figured the students would have to get up in the middle of the performance to catch their bus. Well, 20 minutes after the production began it ended. How they did it I don't know, but they managed to cram all of the details and a few added suprises of both fairy tales into a quick and humorous 20 minutes. Again, ended up in my favorite restaurant with some friends, I have never been surrounded by so much bacon and not eaten any of it. I get so consumed in drinking soju that I forget to eat.
There are many traditions that surround the Korean art for of enjoying dinner, one of which is offering soju to someone who has earned your respect or done something nice. Two gentlemen were kind enough to lend us their table when we walked in with six people. We then approached them with soju glasses and soju offering our thanks. As it turns out we did something in correct because on their way out they stopped to inform us, for 15 minutes, in Korean. Although we couldn't understand them, the tone in their voices said enough.
It was the Chinese New Year throughout Asia...a long weekend for me...which turned out to be a very relaxing and entertaining one.
Friday night I ventured to "Black Club", more like a hole in the wall that resembles my basement in college. Dancing away I was instantiously suprised when Gav and Trev walked in due to their inability to catch a bus to Pusan. I LOVE THEM!
Saturday found me spending most of the day doing nothing and swearing off drinking. Daniel and I went to Outback for dinner thinking it would be a nice afternoon event, only to find ourselves out until 3 that morning...waking up again the next day disappointed in ourselves. There is the great little chicken place underneath Juliannas that offers the coziest booths that seem to suck you in.
Sunday we went to the batting cages and I suprised myself with how well I am still able to hit the ball. Men of all ages stop in sparaticly in all kinds of attire to take a swing, girlfriends watching quietly from the sidelines. I guess you cant find a cheaper way to relieve some stress, 300 won for 15 balls, the equivalent of .30 cents.
We then ventured to Lotte Inves, the newest apartment complex showroom. They construct these beautiful buildings offering examples of what the new apartments will look like, amazing. They are trendy and upscale offering all of the latest technologies. Daniel and I explored each one pretending that we would be purchasing an apart in the near future. Books on display for some reason were all in English, one about Ronald Regan came from the library of a man in New Jersey. Who would think, when writing a book, buying a book or selling a book that it will end up with a price tag of $1.00 and end up in a display apart in Korea.
A round hut like sort of structure with a picture of a cow with a piercing through its nose.
As it turns out this restaurant has the largest gay population in all of Suncheon. Our waiter was running around through the restaurant trying to keep up with the demanding customers, while we watched what seemed to be groups of gay men enter and enjoy in the atmosphere. You see, in Korea, there are no "gay" people as there are no people with special needs, AIDS or cancer, they create a Utopia where everyone is straight, disease free and beautiful society...a nice false hood to live in I suppose, I find it to be disgusting. It is unnerving to never see the other side of society, the one that is not out every night drinking soju dressed in the latest Korean fashions, it is all a farce.
Thursday I ventured over to the "Miracle Library" with my students for a production of Cinderella and Little Red Riding Hood. I was a bit concerned about the time, my class periods are only 50 minutes long so I figured the students would have to get up in the middle of the performance to catch their bus. Well, 20 minutes after the production began it ended. How they did it I don't know, but they managed to cram all of the details and a few added suprises of both fairy tales into a quick and humorous 20 minutes. Again, ended up in my favorite restaurant with some friends, I have never been surrounded by so much bacon and not eaten any of it. I get so consumed in drinking soju that I forget to eat.
There are many traditions that surround the Korean art for of enjoying dinner, one of which is offering soju to someone who has earned your respect or done something nice. Two gentlemen were kind enough to lend us their table when we walked in with six people. We then approached them with soju glasses and soju offering our thanks. As it turns out we did something in correct because on their way out they stopped to inform us, for 15 minutes, in Korean. Although we couldn't understand them, the tone in their voices said enough.
It was the Chinese New Year throughout Asia...a long weekend for me...which turned out to be a very relaxing and entertaining one.
Friday night I ventured to "Black Club", more like a hole in the wall that resembles my basement in college. Dancing away I was instantiously suprised when Gav and Trev walked in due to their inability to catch a bus to Pusan. I LOVE THEM!
Saturday found me spending most of the day doing nothing and swearing off drinking. Daniel and I went to Outback for dinner thinking it would be a nice afternoon event, only to find ourselves out until 3 that morning...waking up again the next day disappointed in ourselves. There is the great little chicken place underneath Juliannas that offers the coziest booths that seem to suck you in.
Sunday we went to the batting cages and I suprised myself with how well I am still able to hit the ball. Men of all ages stop in sparaticly in all kinds of attire to take a swing, girlfriends watching quietly from the sidelines. I guess you cant find a cheaper way to relieve some stress, 300 won for 15 balls, the equivalent of .30 cents.
We then ventured to Lotte Inves, the newest apartment complex showroom. They construct these beautiful buildings offering examples of what the new apartments will look like, amazing. They are trendy and upscale offering all of the latest technologies. Daniel and I explored each one pretending that we would be purchasing an apart in the near future. Books on display for some reason were all in English, one about Ronald Regan came from the library of a man in New Jersey. Who would think, when writing a book, buying a book or selling a book that it will end up with a price tag of $1.00 and end up in a display apart in Korea.
A round hut like sort of structure with a picture of a cow with a piercing through its nose.
As it turns out this restaurant has the largest gay population in all of Suncheon. Our waiter was running around through the restaurant trying to keep up with the demanding customers, while we watched what seemed to be groups of gay men enter and enjoy in the atmosphere. You see, in Korea, there are no "gay" people as there are no people with special needs, AIDS or cancer, they create a Utopia where everyone is straight, disease free and beautiful society...a nice false hood to live in I suppose, I find it to be disgusting. It is unnerving to never see the other side of society, the one that is not out every night drinking soju dressed in the latest Korean fashions, it is all a farce.
2.13.2007
Valentines Day.....take one
Another holiday in Korea...this one however I am determined to make better than last years Valentines Day which was absolutely miserable and certainly worth taking a Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind approach to.
In Korea there are three versions of Valentines Day, just another attempt at capitalizing on the public's desire to shower their friends with gifts.
Take one: Valentines Day in February is less about love and more about chocolate, more so girls giving boys chocolate. I was lucky, most females receive nothing, however, my 4 o'clock class of boys devoted their day to making sure I was happy! I loved it. Coming from America, where Valentines Day is about love and loving, they love me!!! Ha ha, one student exclaimed "Janna Teacher, chocolate no, but....I LOVE YOU!"
Take two:White Day in March is about boys giving to girls, not chocolate but candy...maybe girls are just sweeter. I am not sure of what else will ensue on White Day, but I cant wait to find out. If my 4 o'clock boys loved me today they will certainly love me on White Day.
Take three: Black Day. At first I was a bit taken back by this, are single people seen as the black sh
eep? In Korea there is an odd stigma that surrounds women over the age of 25 that are unmarried, they are seen almost as lepers, as rejects of love. I guess then, I am one of them.
In America there is the same sort of feeling I think, once you hit 25 people start being more inquisitive into your love life, wondering if you have a boyfriend and if so, when you will get engaged and then when you will get married and when you will have children. But here in Korea, they celebrate the single instead of leaving them out, Black Day, the day of eating Black Noodles.
It reminds me of the Sex and the City episode when Carrie losses her shoes and realizes that there is no single girls shower, that there are no wedding gifts and shower gifts for the girl who chooses to remain single...Birthdays don't count, everyone has one.
And so, I look forward to indulging in Black Noodles when the time comes.
And so....I am off....I do indeed have a Valentine, how ever cheesy that is, and he is wicked... and I love it... everyone needs a Valentine.
I think it is my mad love of love getting the best of me .
Happy Valentines Day!!!!!!!!
In Korea there are three versions of Valentines Day, just another attempt at capitalizing on the public's desire to shower their friends with gifts.
Take one: Valentines Day in February is less about love and more about chocolate, more so girls giving boys chocolate. I was lucky, most females receive nothing, however, my 4 o'clock class of boys devoted their day to making sure I was happy! I loved it. Coming from America, where Valentines Day is about love and loving, they love me!!! Ha ha, one student exclaimed "Janna Teacher, chocolate no, but....I LOVE YOU!"Take two:White Day in March is about boys giving to girls, not chocolate but candy...maybe girls are just sweeter. I am not sure of what else will ensue on White Day, but I cant wait to find out. If my 4 o'clock boys loved me today they will certainly love me on White Day.
Take three: Black Day. At first I was a bit taken back by this, are single people seen as the black sh
eep? In Korea there is an odd stigma that surrounds women over the age of 25 that are unmarried, they are seen almost as lepers, as rejects of love. I guess then, I am one of them.In America there is the same sort of feeling I think, once you hit 25 people start being more inquisitive into your love life, wondering if you have a boyfriend and if so, when you will get engaged and then when you will get married and when you will have children. But here in Korea, they celebrate the single instead of leaving them out, Black Day, the day of eating Black Noodles.
It reminds me of the Sex and the City episode when Carrie losses her shoes and realizes that there is no single girls shower, that there are no wedding gifts and shower gifts for the girl who chooses to remain single...Birthdays don't count, everyone has one.
And so, I look forward to indulging in Black Noodles when the time comes.
And so....I am off....I do indeed have a Valentine, how ever cheesy that is, and he is wicked... and I love it... everyone needs a Valentine.
I think it is my mad love of love getting the best of me .
Happy Valentines Day!!!!!!!!
2.02.2007
Rabbitt, Rabbitt the unconventional way...
February is already here, I cant get my head around it. How is time flying by so fast? This week was an unconventional one, learning about Korean food, Korean men and the art of drinking excessive amounts of soju.
I went out for Song-gip-sa last night, thick pieces of what looks like bacon that you cook on a grill in front of you. To my surprise I enjoyed it. I think I enjoy the ambiance of Korean dining more then the actual art form. Inside what looks like a run down building is this quaint eight table restaurants with tree stumps as the table chairs. The kind man who may work there but we aren't sure, sat down with us, drank soju, began cooking our meal and then complained when I, the only woman at the table wasn't cooking. I guess that is one cultural medium, men love to be cared for.
I also realized this week that Korea is one of the only places that I know of where drinking is encouraged on the job. I walked into school Thursday morning already slightly hung over to one of my co-teachers handing me a bottle of homemade wine and a glass "drink this today". The day was interesting and I ended up feeling worse then when it began.
I also explored some new movies this week, (this blog is so lame huh), Boondocks Saints, someone somewhere along my travel through life highly recommended it, I highly disagree other than the great Boston setting. I also saw Shaun of the Dead, and again....do not recommend it.
Well....enough....the weekend is here....I hope Monday takes its time coming!
I went out for Song-gip-sa last night, thick pieces of what looks like bacon that you cook on a grill in front of you. To my surprise I enjoyed it. I think I enjoy the ambiance of Korean dining more then the actual art form. Inside what looks like a run down building is this quaint eight table restaurants with tree stumps as the table chairs. The kind man who may work there but we aren't sure, sat down with us, drank soju, began cooking our meal and then complained when I, the only woman at the table wasn't cooking. I guess that is one cultural medium, men love to be cared for.
I also realized this week that Korea is one of the only places that I know of where drinking is encouraged on the job. I walked into school Thursday morning already slightly hung over to one of my co-teachers handing me a bottle of homemade wine and a glass "drink this today". The day was interesting and I ended up feeling worse then when it began.
I also explored some new movies this week, (this blog is so lame huh), Boondocks Saints, someone somewhere along my travel through life highly recommended it, I highly disagree other than the great Boston setting. I also saw Shaun of the Dead, and again....do not recommend it.
Well....enough....the weekend is here....I hope Monday takes its time coming!
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